Dating After Divorce

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BEHRENDT LAW CHAMBERS Divorce and Family Law

Dating After Divorce

Once your marriage ends, you may wonder about dating after divorce.

From a moral point of view, I don’t think that there’s anything wrong with dating after you’ve separated but before your divorce is finalized. The reality is that your marriage is over, even if this has not been completed from a legal and formal view. It’s time to move on with your life, and this can be healthy way to do it.

However, there can be practical problems in resolving legal matters if you don’t wait until after your divorce to start dating. It is quite normal for your ex, even if your ex is the one who initiated the separation, to be quite upset about that fact that you have moved on.

Your ex may then make it very difficult to resolve the legal issues. I have seen several cases in which swift progress was being made to resolve matters and finalize the divorce, and which came to a grinding halt after one party started dating. The result of this is often many months of delays and thousands of dollars in legal fees.

So, I recommend that you not start dating until after your divorce. Knowing that this advice often falls on deaf ears, at least be discreet as possible if you choose to ignore it. The reality is that it’s a small world, and the chances are good that your spouse will find out what you are doing.

As well, many people rush into dating before they are really ready to do this, simply out of a need for companionship. By waiting until after your divorce to start, you avoid this mistake.

Once you do start dating after divorce, if you do have children, it is important that deal with any concerns they may have. Otherwise, you’re bound to find your children doing whatever they can do sabotage your new relationship. Introduce your new relationship to your children only when you are sure that it is of some permanence, and even then, do things slowly. As well, make sure that your dating time does not take away from your parenting time.

Especially after a long-term marriage, it can be difficult to get back into the dating world once you’ve divorced. For help with this, click here to find out a better way to date.

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Also, if you would like to discuss legal services in other areas of Canadian family law, you're invited to call us toll-free at 1-888-832-2456, or e-mail us at Behrendt@OttawaDivorce.com.

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